Millions of American women, as well as men, are physically and emotionally abused by their partners each year. Chances are, someone you know-your mother, sister, friend, coworker or neighbor-is a victim of domestic violence. Perhaps you feel your friend's problem will "work itself out." The truth is that generally the violence will not end until someone takes action to stop it.

What You Can Do:

• Become Informed
  Gather all the information you can about domestic violence. Contact the Covington Domestic Violence Task Force at: 253-638-1110, Ext. 2237 to receive an information packet or to talk with an advocate about how you can be most helpful.

• Lend A Sympathetic Ear
  Letting your friend know you care and are willing to listen may be the best help you can offer. Don't force it, allow them to confide at their own pace. Keep an open mind; never blame or minimize the situation. Focus on supporting their right to make their own choices in their own time. Be very careful not to increase their danger by sharing anything they tell you with an unsafe person-and never, under any circumstances, with the abuser.

• Guide Them To Services
  When your friend asks for advice, share the information you've learned. Encourage your friend to call the local domestic violence hotline. Many people who are abused first seek help from marriage counselors, members of the clergy or their doctor. Not all helping professionals are fully aware of the special circumstances of abused women. If the first person your friend contacts is not helpful, encourage your friend to find assistance elsewhere.

• Focus On Your Friend's Strengths
  Abuse systematically strips the victims of their sense of self-worth. Giver your friend the emotional support they need to believe that they are a good and worthy person. Help them examine their strengths and skills. Emphasize that they and their children deserve a life free from abuse in any form-emotional or physical.

• Help Them Develop A Safety Plan
  Help them think through the steps they should take if their partner becomes abusive again and/or if they need to leave suddenly. This is a critical step and it is recommended that the victim develop a safety plan with a professional domestic violence advocate.

• If They Decide To Leave
  It is important to remember that battered women and men are in the greatest danger when they attempt to leave their abuser. Leaving should happen with a well thought out safety plan. Encourage your friend to call the local domestic violence hotline. Advocates can help them examine their options for maintaining safety and support them through the difficult and often dangerous process of leaving.